Stretch IDES to 20 yos. At 19 now

L

LuLa

PEB Forum Regular Member
Registered Member
I am super scared to post this but I need help. Been AD for 19 years and have held in my sexual assault trauma for 12 years. Never told anyone. I didn’t want to get kicked out for mental health issues but the mask I’ve been wearing for 12 years is getting too heavy to hold.

I sought treatment with MH two years ago. Diagnosed with Anxiety/Depression. Never told my therapist about the incident but wanted to. Treatment ended after one year and received meds to help. Which they do…to a point.

I was able to hide my fear for years but now it’s unbearable. I am scared to go TDY anymore. I cannot work with men without severe anxiety (which is most of the military). I can’t work out on post because there are mostly men there. Work is literally killing me. Life has become almost unbearable.

All that said, if I report this and I’m diagnosed with something PTSD or some other mental disorder, can I be MEB’d?

Also, I’m within a year of retirement. Def don’t want to retire medically before 20 but I also want the service to treat me and/or start an MEB.

I also don’t just want to push the button and ignore what happened. I think the military owes me help. What can I do to stretch the IDES process to retire at 20 yos?

Any and all recommendations welcome.
 
I'm sorry to hear you and your trust in teammates was violated. It is inexcusable behavior.

Yes, it is possible that it would result in an MEB. But treatment should be offered first It is also possible that it would not result in a MEB. Severity of symptoms would be the deciding point.

The VA has Vet Centers all around the country. Each office has a staff member with specialized training in MST. Going to Vet Center is completely separate from DoD mental health.

If you go the Vet Center route, you can have those records included in your Benefits Delivery at Discharge package.
 
Definitely, the Vet Center as @chaplaincharlie stated above! How much time before the end of your current enlistment contract ends? Also how far into your 19th year are you? Depending on the service branch, IDES is taking approx 6-9 months on average. That's typically without any delays such as appeals.
 
LuLa said:
Great advice! Thank you! I will seek them out.
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Don't be discouraged if the nearest Vet Center is a little too far away They often send counselors out to disperse sites within their area of responsibility.
 
LuLa said:
Copy all on the vet center. TY!
I am exactly 1 year from my 20 yos. Also, I’m an officer and no longer have a service commitment.
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A service commitment doesn't come into play if you are PEB'd.
 
LuLa said:
Copy all on the vet center. TY!
I am exactly 1 year from my 20 yos. Also, I’m an officer and no longer have a service commitment.
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Roger that and first, thank you for your service and second, I'm so sorry you have had to endure such behavior. All the best for you and your health going forward :)
The nice thing about this site is that you're anonymous, so am glad you found a venue to bring that info out to finally (and hopefully) you can get the help you need.
 
chaplaincharlie said:
A service commitment doesn't come into play if you are PEB'd.
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I was thinking more along the lines of dropping retirement papers, which, if you have an obligation still, you wouldn't be able to do under most, if not all circumstances, hence why I asked :)
 
LuLa said:
I am super scared to post this but I need help. Been AD for 19 years and have held in my sexual assault trauma for 12 years. Never told anyone. I didn’t want to get kicked out for mental health issues but the mask I’ve been wearing for 12 years is getting too heavy to hold.

I sought treatment with MH two years ago. Diagnosed with Anxiety/Depression. Never told my therapist about the incident but wanted to. Treatment ended after one year and received meds to help. Which they do…to a point.

I was able to hide my fear for years but now it’s unbearable. I am scared to go TDY anymore. I cannot work with men without severe anxiety (which is most of the military). I can’t work out on post because there are mostly men there. Work is literally killing me. Life has become almost unbearable.

All that said, if I report this and I’m diagnosed with something PTSD or some other mental disorder, can I be MEB’d?

Also, I’m within a year of retirement. Def don’t want to retire medically before 20 but I also want the service to treat me and/or start an MEB.

I also don’t just want to push the button and ignore what happened. I think the military owes me help. What can I do to stretch the IDES process to retire at 20 yos?

Any and all recommendations welcome.
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If you are trying to get a MEB started, do not apply for retirement. If you do they can find you Fit for Duty on the presumption of fitness. I am currently fighting my fit for duty rating because I had a retirement date, that I pulled because of the MEB. Good luck in getting the help you need and the correct rating from the Army and Va.
 
CAnsley said:
If you are trying to get a MEB started, do not apply for retirement. If you do they can find you Fit for Duty on the presumption of fitness. I am currently fighting my fit for duty rating because I had a retirement date, that I pulled because of the MEB. Good luck in getting the help you need and the correct rating from the Army and Va.
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There is very little benefit to a MEB if you can reach 20 years since you will qualify for CRDP meaning you get your pension and VA disability without requiring an offset. The only way I can see a benefit if MEB route is if the injury is severe enough to be rated higher than your earned regular retirement rate and the condition was combat related.
 
CAnsley said:
If you are trying to get a MEB started, do not apply for retirement. If you do they can find you Fit for Duty on the presumption of fitness. I am currently fighting my fit for duty rating because I had a retirement date, that I pulled because of the MEB. Good luck in getting the help you need and the correct rating from the Army and Va.
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This is great advice bc I wasn’t sure if I should press the button or not. Ty! I will hold off.
 
Just focus on taking care of your mental health, get seen and get everything documented. Dont push for a MEB, but be honest about the severity of your condition. There are many ways to appeal and draw out the process, if you are worried about a possible MEB, then save all of your terminal leave as it all counts toward your 20.
 
CAnsley said:
If you are trying to get a MEB started, do not apply for retirement. If you do they can find you Fit for Duty on the presumption of fitness. I am currently fighting my fit for duty rating because I had a retirement date, that I pulled because of the MEB. Good luck in getting the help you need and the correct rating from the Army and Va.
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Hello Lula, going in for treatment will not get you a MEB referral right away. They do treat you first to see how bad it is and to determine if you can be stable with your condition. This is coming from someone who spent over two years in treatment. You can be in treatment as long as you can hold on and make it work, of course with the treatment plan by the psychologist.
 
LuLa said:
I am super scared to post this but I need help. Been AD for 19 years and have held in my sexual assault trauma for 12 years. Never told anyone. I didn’t want to get kicked out for mental health issues but the mask I’ve been wearing for 12 years is getting too heavy to hold.

I sought treatment with MH two years ago. Diagnosed with Anxiety/Depression. Never told my therapist about the incident but wanted to. Treatment ended after one year and received meds to help. Which they do…to a point.

I was able to hide my fear for years but now it’s unbearable. I am scared to go TDY anymore. I cannot work with men without severe anxiety (which is most of the military). I can’t work out on post because there are mostly men there. Work is literally killing me. Life has become almost unbearable.

All that said, if I report this and I’m diagnosed with something PTSD or some other mental disorder, can I be MEB’d?

Also, I’m within a year of retirement. Def don’t want to retire medically before 20 but I also want the service to treat me and/or start an MEB.

I also don’t just want to push the button and ignore what happened. I think the military owes me help. What can I do to stretch the IDES process to retire at 20 yos?

Any and all recommendations welcome.
Click to expand...
Hello Lula, going in for treatment will not get you a MEB referral right away. They do treat you first to see how bad it is and to determine if you can be stable with your condition. This is coming from someone who spent over two years in treatment. You can be in treatment as long as you can hold on and make it work, of course with the treatment plan by the psychologist. Ultimately, I could not do my job anymore even after treatment which is why I was referred to an MEB. I am on COAD, in a limited duty status and will hit my 20 yrs in 6 months. An officer as well.
 
Hi Lula. I am currently seeing a Vet Center MH professional for PTSD. My visits are via telehealth, which helps me greatly. I find that if I'm in a room with a therapist I am more prone to crying and being unable to speak. Having that digital separation makes the communication much easier. Try a few online appointments if you want to ease into it. All the best to you. I'm very sorry to hear about your traumatic experience.
 
Treadless Patriot said:
Hello Lula, going in for treatment will not get you a MEB referral right away. They do treat you first to see how bad it is and to determine if you can be stable with your condition. This is coming from someone who spent over two years in treatment. You can be in treatment as long as you can hold on and make it work, of course with the treatment plan by the psychologist. Ultimately, I could not do my job anymore even after treatment which is why I was referred to an MEB. I am on COAD, in a limited duty status and will hit my 20 yrs in 6 months. An officer as well.
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Thank you for sharing your story. I saw MH for a year. During that time, I couldn’t bring myself to talk about the assault. If I don’t say anything, I will have to continue carrying this without help.
Do you think I should go back to the same MH counselor since she already knows me?
 
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